Am I Normal?
We just found out yesterday that I am pregnant! I feel like my entire life and world has changed in the blink of an eye and yet the world is going on and I am expected to go on as normal too! I am worried, stressed, freaking out! We won't have the same friends, will we have any friends at all?! Will people look down on us because we are so young (I'm 19, hubby 21). Hubby is sooooo happy beyond belief. My mom is disappointed that we are having kids so young, even though it was NOT planned! And I am stuck in the middle, not sure what to think or feel or do!!!
Please please help!!!
Calm down. You need to give yourself some time to get used to the idea of being pregnant. It's completely normal to feel overwhelmed in this situation. Talk to your husband about your concerns and maybe consider speaking to a counsellor as well (you'll be able to find a counsellor that offers free sessions in your area). Don't worry about finding friends - most women say they made great friends with other women in pregnancy classes or mothers groups. In the end, you are pregnant. There's nothing you can do to change that (aside from termination, which I don't think you want to do). You've got nine months to get used to the idea before baby comes along. Try to understand that it's normal to feel this way and that your feelings will change as your pregnancy progresses. Same with your mother; she will come around to the idea and I guarantee she will adore her new grandchild! Good luck :)
I'm not sure I believe it was "unplanned." Unplanned in the sense that you're shocked, you didn't think it would actually happen, etc. but you have been on here the past few months talking about wanting a baby, possible pregnancy symptoms, overly excited about the possibility of pregnancy... I mean, obviously you weren't really preventing it and the idea of becoming pregnant had to of crossed your mind. You're 19, and if I know 19 year old girls at all, once they get an idea/plan in their minds there is no stopping it. Becoming pregnant is usually pretty simple at 19, even one "oops" can lead to a pregnancy.
My advice to you is, start researching and thinking clearly as a future parent. A baby is a HUGE deal. It's not like adopting a kitten or babysitting, it's a round the clock every single day of the year responsibility. And yes, it can be extremely hard and frustrating. Consider the help you will have when the baby is born, your goals for the next 5 years, your finances, and start planning a future for yourself. I was a younger Mom, I got pregnant at 23 and sometimes I wish I would of waited a few more years. I love Rowan more than the air I breathe, but looking back on it now maybe it was too hasty of a decision. We weren't at a good place back then, financially or emotionally, and we are just now breathing some fresh air and doing better.
Honestly, the only thing holding me back from getting pregnant right now is the fact that we don't have ANY help. My mom is the only person who watches Rowan, and that's usually only once or twice a month for a few hours. We never get any "adult time" by ourselves or date nights. And we can't really afford to put her in a pricey daycare just for some time to ourselves. A new baby would mean double duty and much more stress, but I also want to be done with having babies. I almost want to get the second one "out of the way" so to speak.
Yes, I wrote something similar on another of bostonsavvy's threads. You've started a lot of threads and gotten excited every month about the possibility of being pregnant. You can't have been using protection very carefully if you think you might be pregnant every month.
Originally Posted by rowangreeneyes