I like Rowan and Leo from your list, but I also think Brennan is a good name from his. Brennan has a similar sound to Rowan and isn't really trendy or used much. Might be a good choice??? :)
This is a hard situation, and I'm just lucky that DH isn't a native English speaker. He mainly vetoes names based on whether they sound too feminine to him (like Eli), or they are difficult for his family to say (like Sterling). I personally love Elias, Darius, and Sterling, and I kind of see these 3 as a happy middle ground... you may just need to compromise. After all, it is important to remember that while you need to like the name, it involves not only the both of you, but also the child... so ultimately what will matter is whether or not HE likes the name. My brother and sister-in-law had big problems naming their children (he liked old-fashioned, short names, and she liked... well, trendy, almost unisex names)... and they could not agree. So, finally they decided that my brother named the first one, and she named the second. However, the partner not naming the child still got a veto. This at least assured that the kid wouldn't get a crazy name or a name you absolutely hate. When the third was a girl, they had an easier time agreeing. I'm not sure whether or not such a system would work for you, but it is something to consider (especially if you plan to have more children).
An afterthought, you mentioned Jude. Does he like Jude? Jude Rowan? Rowan Elijah Jude? Elias Jude? Jude Elias?
I still really like/suggest Elijah Leonidas nn Elias. You both win. He gets his first name, you get your middle name and nickname. (If you take "Eli" from Elijah and then the "as" from Leonidas)
Do you really hate Zane? I think it's nice and I definitely have your style of names over his. Zane Apollo or Zane Elias or Zane Leonidas are all nice!
Elijah Leonidas is a great idea, but I have feeling if I went with that, NO ONE would call him Elias except for me. Which I guess wouldn't be the end of the world...
Zane. Meh. First of all, it rhymes with Dad's name, which IMO is confusing and annoying. I suggested we used the name Lysander, and call him Zane for short, but that was vetoed.
I *think* he might be back on board with Rowan. I'm not sure. Lots of good suggestions in this thread, though (and BTW - I'm open to totally new suggestions of names not on our lists), so we've got lots to think about.
I agree with another berry that Eli would make a great compromise since he likes Elijiah and you like Elias.
While some of your husband's choices are somewhat trendy/popular like Jayden, I really don't see Zane as a trendy/popular name. I think that Zane is actually a really awesome name.
Even though Zane isn't as popular as Jayden and the others...it's still a name that was hardly ever used before 10 years ago, and then suddenly had a massive spike in popularity, jumping hundreds of places in the popularity charts in a matter of years.
I'm okay with using a more popular name (although I'd rather not) such as Elijah or something, if it's been more steady in popularity for the past 100 years.
"Dying whale noise" made me laugh. Thanks for that. :)
On his list I like Elijah and Brennan. On your list I like Apollo, Leo, Lysander, Darius and Rowan!
Could we meet in the middle? I am not really fond of either list. His is soooooo trendy, and yours is a little out there for most men. I do love Leo, but Leonidas is not my style. I think Apollo Jude is fantastic, but my husband wouldn't agree to that one either. How about:
I like Leo, maybe something else like Leonardo.
Elias sounds just as "soft" to me as Elijah.
I also like Jude. I like Brennan.
It would be good for both of you to try the other's point of view. Compromise.
Other names you might like are:
I know how hard it is to find the perfect boy's name. Here's a few to spark your imagination. You don't want a crusty old overused one or a trashy new overused one, you know? Pick carefully!